Melanie has put together my own blog webpage! it is soooo cute....http://bijouxkitty.com/. You will be able to leave comments even if you don't subscribe, which will be nice since I've had so many people tell me they aren't able to comment on here. So please check it out!!!! I am going to keep this blogger as well, but will be using the new site from now on.
http://bijouxkitty.com/
<3
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
ONE WEEK!
YAYAYAY!!!!! One week clean and sober! Last night was AWFUL! I had panic attacks, I had WICKED cravings, I basically lost it. But it passed and I survived. I guess that's what you have to keep remembering...it will pass. Crazy dreams again, but it was explained to me that when you smoke pot before bed [which I used to] your brain doesn't go into full REM's so you don't really have a deep sleep or dream. Now the brain is re-programming itself , so all these crazy dreams start happening. But again, as real as they feel, I just have to tell myself 'it was just a dream' and breathe and forget about it. I think I may lay in bed for awhile. It's early and I do have a pretty bad headache...but I am excited. Kinda like xmas morning...lolol. Thank you to whomever has been reading these, and given me words of encouragement. You have no idea how much it has helped me. I don't think I will document every day on here now [my quitting progress that is], but instead move forward and start writing about the other things I am going to do with my life and focus on that. The world is all mine to re-discover!!!
((^_^))
((^_^))
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Day 6
Whoooo! I had my first 'user dream' last night. I woke up wishing I had pot, but it passed super quick. I am still getting headaches and can't eat much, but that will get better in time.
[Just so the friends I have that haven't known me super long know...the reason this has been so hard for me is because I smoked every day for about 15 years. This isn't just a couple joints here and there habit. I just wanted to clarify that so it didn't seem like I am being dramatic or something.]
I spent the day yesterday making our house look more lived in from the outside. I think the reason we have had a few door knocks late at night is because we don't have a car, and also this house was empty for awhile before we moved in. So I did some things like put plants on our front porch and set up the badminton net in the back yard. Hopefully to deter crack/meth heads from wanting to use the house as a squat and stop the knocking on our doors late at night. My neighbors seem to also think this is why our house get targeted more often.
I can't believe it's a week tomorrow!!! [pats self on back] I ordered some new books as a reward :D
[Just so the friends I have that haven't known me super long know...the reason this has been so hard for me is because I smoked every day for about 15 years. This isn't just a couple joints here and there habit. I just wanted to clarify that so it didn't seem like I am being dramatic or something.]
I spent the day yesterday making our house look more lived in from the outside. I think the reason we have had a few door knocks late at night is because we don't have a car, and also this house was empty for awhile before we moved in. So I did some things like put plants on our front porch and set up the badminton net in the back yard. Hopefully to deter crack/meth heads from wanting to use the house as a squat and stop the knocking on our doors late at night. My neighbors seem to also think this is why our house get targeted more often.
I can't believe it's a week tomorrow!!! [pats self on back] I ordered some new books as a reward :D
Monday, June 1, 2009
DAY 5!!!
Two more days until a whole week!!! As most of you know, someone tried to break into my house last night, and it wasn't just a door knob turn...this guy meant business. Today I found the fence ripped out of the ground and his t shirt. I handed the shirt over to the police. I will write more about this experience later because my head is mush from lack of sleep, but I just wanted to document my 5 days achievement! And I didn't really have any cravings today. Wheee! ((^_^))
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